Sippy Cups are for Seltzer Water

My latest shipment of the goods.

My latest shipment of the goods.

Some mamas need a glass of wine or a vodka drink to unwind. Not me.

I want water…but not just any water.

I need seltzer water.

You see, I have an addiction to seltzer water. It’s what I call my crack in a can.

The problem started like any other addiction. A seltzer here. A seltzer there.  A seltzer in the morning.  A seltzer at night. Now I’m up to a 6-pack a day and I can’t quit.  The Dude is also addicted. In fact, he’s the one that got me hooked. He even has this stuff delivered to his office. The worst part of all is that we’re now passing on the problem to the Monkey.

Just like his parents, the Monkey really wasn’t into the filtered water from the fridge. He would never drink water, even if I added some apple juice. He only wanted his milk, which he only takes in a bottle. A few weeks ago, the Dude and I cracked open our usual seltzer cans with dinner and the Monkey started eyeing them. He wanted to try it. At first sip, he was startled by the bubbles and took a step back. But just like any future addict, he came back for more. The next sip startled him again, but this time he giggled. Then he took another sip. And another. Now, seltzer water is all he wants. Mind you, he can’t actually say “seltzer water” but he does yell “WA-WA!!!” while gesturing frantically whenever we crack open a seltzer can.

We’ve created a seltzer-soaked monster. The good news though is that he’s actually drinking water and he drinks it in a sippy cup. He wasn’t doing either of those things a few weeks ago.

So now we all live in a seltzer-crack house and our dealer is the local Safeway/Vons store. I don’t know what it is about their seltzer water, but it’s the best I’ve ever had. And I’ve had ‘em all by now. As you can see by the picture, this isn’t a joke. That’s my most recent shipment, which lasts maybe two months. My seltzer shipments are so big that I actually have to phone the orders in rather than order them online. Now I’m known as the seltzer lady every time I call. You know you have a true seltzer addiction when you call your dealer for a delivery (in this case a major grocery store chain) and they know who you are by the sound of your voice.

signature

P.S. Yes, we recycle.