I’m walking the five blocks home from the Gymboree Play and Music location where my 8-month-old son, Josh, takes classes. I have him in the baby carrier, his pom-pom hat brushing my chin.  I’m ravenous.

What to eat?  I’m on a restricted diet because I’m still nursing Josh and his lower intestines can’t quite process dairy or soy yet.  It’s a common intolerance, as the pediatrician has stressed, not an allergy, and he will likely grow out of it around age one.  But I haven’t had a chocolate milkshake since I was pregnant, and I hadn’t intended to give them up postpartum.

I walk past the three, yes, three, pizza places on the next two blocks.  I see fresh pies emerging from the oven as I pass the last shop. The 20 pounds of baby strapped to me dissipate as I make a hard left toward the door, ready to devour a whole cheese pie, baked ziti, even the “B” health grade sign the New York Sanitation department has displayed in the window.  Alas, nearly everything has soy in it, so the sign probably isn’t safe.

On the couch back home, I’m malnourished and cranky.  Mr. No Dairy No Soy is latched to my breast, drinking away.  I debate ordering a rare steak à la carte from the Argentine place up the street, when little blue eyes takes a break, smiles at me so wide I see all five of his adorable teeth, nuzzles me, then chomps down so hard on my left nipple that he breaks skin.

I scream.  He giggles.

The solution seems obvious.  Stop being a martyr.  Stop breastfeeding.  Eat a buttery cupcake.  But dairy and soy intolerance requires special infant formula.  When I give this special formula to my son (who will willingly accept a bottle from anyone), he takes a sip, scrunches his face to suggest I have poured toxic slime into his mouth, and shoves the bottle aside.

And there’s more to this than formula rejection.  Perhaps every parent has his or her thing.  Some take on sleep; others, sign language. I knew I wanted to try breastfeeding as surely as I also knew I wanted an epidural, preferably before labor pains started (success!).   Breastfeeding didn’t come easily but after two months of pumping and crying and infections and love and encouragement from friends, family, and professionals, it clicked.  (Go Michelle Obama for recognizing the critical need for support and workplace accommodations for breastfeeding moms.)

I like breastfeeding for the bond with Josh, for the financial break, for the gift of not having to smell the putrid special formula, but mostly for something else.  My husband and I for the most part planned our pregnancy, but getting pregnant still changed my theory of the universe from quantum to chaos.  Finally, in the last few months, I’ve started to see a few patterns in the randomness.  Nursing Josh forces me to periodically stop my day and breathe, which I find helpful these days for more than just physical survival.

When I nurse Josh without my iPhone nearby—something at which I’ve gotten much better—I watch him.  I play with his hair, rub his back, kiss his hands.  I catch myself actually not thinking.  And other times as he swats at me, pulls my hair out of my head, and unintentionally (I hope) picks my nose, I do think, a lot.  I think about him growing up, about how I want to help him learn to care for himself, to make himself happy.  I think about myself, about what I want for my life with him and with our family, what balance I want between work and home.  They’re heavy topics, but there’s a calm that comes from thinking while nursing.

I don’t think breastfeeding is the only way to bond or relax with an infant, by any stretch of the imagination.  And I don’t think it’s right for every mother, especially if it’s only creating excess stress. But it has become an integral, wonderful part of my relationship with Josh.  So, I will forge ahead until his first birthday when I’ll begin to wean him, and myself.  Until then I’ll treat my battle wounds with lanolin cream and do the walk to and from Gymboree with drool pouring from my mouth.  It may not be pretty, but I’ll put on a bib and Josh and I will be two of a kind.

The Dude photographs monkeys of all kinds.

One Sunday morning at the beginning of last year, I read this piece in the New York Times Magazine, which postulates that parenting today is defined by the process of archiving digital media of our children.  More morosely, it explains that

American children in 2010 have a bright, clear reason for being. They exist to furnish subjects for digital photographs that can be corrected, cropped, captioned, organized, categorized, albumized, broadcast, turned into screen savers and brandished on online social networks.

Tongue even more firmly in cheek, the article describes the initiation process into digital parenthood:

The marching orders come immediately, with the newborn photo, which must be e-mailed to friends before a baby has left the maternity ward. A conscientious father . . . must snap dozens of shots of the modestly wrapped newborn. . . . Back at a laptop, he uploads the haul, scrutinizing pixels. . . . He selects a becoming one. The mother signs off, often via e-mail, from her hospital bed. . . . Thus a parent is minted.

Indeed.  And it doesn’t stop at the hospital. We all take virtual piles of pictures now that digital cameras have become nearly disposable in price and cameraphones ubiquitious.  But for all of the advantages of digital media — immediacy, bottomless storage, etc. — there is one serious disadvantage: It takes but a small computer problem to lose it all.  Anyone who’s experienced a hard drive crash can attest to just how many precious memories can be lost in an instant.  And, disaster aside, I think we’ve all grown a bit overwhelmed by the sheer number of files and sources of our digital media.

So, given my role as Archivist-in-Chief in our household, Aimee thought I might be able to give AYMB readers some helpful advice by describing what we do in terms of documenting the Monkey, how we archive/curate it all, and how we secure and back it up.  But first, some background.

The Dude, Digital Archivist
If digital archiving is the hallmark of 21st century parenting, then I had been minted as Dad long before biologically becoming one.  For reasons only a psychiatrist could explain, I’ve always been a bit of a digital archivist.  By the time I graduated law school, I had stored on my computer not only every paper I had written since high school, but also, freakishly, every email I had ever written and every digital picture I had ever taken.  Then, I undertook the project of digitizing my collection of thousands of CDs.  Throw in, over the next few years, a concert photography hobby, a side-gig as live-show archivist for a band, and another pile of music, and I was juggling a few terrabytes of data before the Monkey was even a proverbial glimmer.

In short, I was well prepared for tackling the project of documenting, archiving, and curating all things Monkey.  I packed for the Monkey’s birth as I did for any other adventure: neatly stuffing into my camera bag 2 digital SLR bodies, 4 lenses, an external flash, gig after gig of memory cards, more chargers and batteries than you could imagine, and a digital HD video camera.  My bag weighed more than the Monkey at birth — and the replacement value eclipsed the hospital bill.  But it was worth it in every way. Aimee did indeed sign off on a picture, and we used it to announce the Monkey to the world before even leaving the hospital.

Parenting by 1s and 0s
I’d bet dollars to donuts that this long walk down a short digital pier resonates with many AYMB readers — if not in scale, then at least in theme.  If it does, consider following advice for managing your digital memories:

1. Take lots of pictures and video (and voice memos). Memory and storage is cheap these days.  A 4GB SD card can be had for $25 bucks.  4GB!?!  That’ll hold thousands of pics.  Snap away.  Don’t be shy.  You can delete later, but you can’t recapture lost moments.

2. Dont forget about your smart phone. With smart phones getting much cheaper, we have access to a lot more ways to record life.  That iPhone (or equivalent) in your pocket takes pretty darn good pictures, records pretty good sound files, and (the newest generation, at least) shoots some pretty incredible video.  Your phone is the one electronic device you almost always have with you.  Don’t forget it’s there.

3. Find a workflow that works . . . and stick to it. As with anything in life, you will be more likely to stick to it if you can find a routine that works for you.  On a computer, we call that “workflow.”  It’s what you do, start to finish, to get your media off your devices, onto your computer, onto the web, and backed up safely.  Everyone’s workflow will be different, and you need to find the one that works for you.  Here’s mine:

• I create a topical folder for each photgraphed “event.”  For example, we took The Monkey to play in the snow over the weekend, bringing with our two iPhones, Aimee’s point-and-shoot, and my SLR.  When we got back, I dumped the media from each of those four sources into one folder entitled “2011-01-08 (snow-day).”
• I generally sift and edit photos in Picasa.  Although I use Lightroom and Aperture for more extensive editing jobs, I find Picasa to be the most intuitive, fastest, and most complete program (especially because I use Picasa for online storage and sharing).  Picasa is free and, for those who care, non-destructive.  iPhoto is great, I’m sure; I’ve never used it.
• I take a couple “laps” through a set of pictures.  During the first lap I flag (in Picasa, I use the star system) the pics that should be deleted.  Those are the ones that are just plain bad — bad exposure, bad framing, blur, someone eating with their mouth open, etc.  I would guess that I delete almost 2/3 of all pictures in this first lap.  After deleting those, the next lap is dedicated to culling the pics that are passable and worth editing and sharing.  Generally, I’d say about half of the pictures make it out of this lap and into a “final” subfolder (and then online for sharing with family and friends).  This time, I don’t delete the “non-final” ones; I keep them for future re-editing, alternate versions, etc.  Again, storage is pretty cheap.
• I finish up by dragging that folder onto my external storage device for backing up and safe keeping.

4. Use effective naming conventions and folder structures. This one sounds dorky, but it helps a ton.  As I mentioned, I organize my photos by “events.”  I always use the YYYY-MM-DD (event name) convention because it will sort/alphabetize property, and because it allows quick identification.  I then place those topical/event folders within folders by year.  2008, 2009, 2010, etc.  If you don’t take a lot of pictures, these yearly folders might not be necessary.  It helps me a lot.

5. Backup early and often. I have literally hundreds of hours and thousands of dollars invested into my photos.  And that’s just the tip of the iceberg.  Their sentimental and historical value is truly beyond measure.  And it could take as little as a three-year-old spilling water, electrical spike, or hard drive crash to wipe it all out.  Everything.  In a second.  And, yes, hard drives do fail.  Often.  They’re tiny magnetic discs that spin400,000 times per hour.  Even the best ones eventually break.

So, I remain vigilant about backups.  I’ll describe my backup system below, but mine is almost certainly more complicated than yours needs to be.  The casual photographer probably can get away with a simple external hard drive; amazon.com has several 500GB ones for much less than $100.  You can manually drag your prized data onto it, or could use any number of free or cheap backup programs.  Apple users should consider Time Machine, for example.  For those into idiot-proof solutions, I’ve found the Click-Free auto-backup external drive to be a nice solution.  My mom has used one for a couple years now, with not one complaint.  (And she set it up without me!)

If you’re as paranoid as I am, you might consider a bulkier setup.  I have a 6TB RAID-configured Network Attached Storage device in the closet with our networking and stereo equipment.  That’s a fancy way of saying that I have a very big, very reliable hard drive stored out of harm’s way.  The Monkey can’t spill on it.  I can’t accidentally drop it.  And, because it’s attached to a $40 UPS (uninterruptible power supply), it can shut down safely in the event of a power outage.  As soon as I’m done sifting/editing, my pictures get stored on that drive.  And then, because I’m truly paranoid, I have a second drive that I store at my office and bring home once/month to clone the home drive.  The off-site drive gives me a second backup that should add protection against theft, fire, flood, earthquake etc.

Your Tips?
Do you have any tips you’d like to share with AYMB readers?  We’d love to hear from you.

Happy shutterbugging.

Brined and cooked to perfection!

Around this time last year, I posted a guest feature from one of my favorite professional chefs, Chef Ryan, on how to cook the perfect turkey. I have now used this recipe several times and, without fail, each turkey turns out amazing. If you’re looking for the perfect turkey recipe, don’t look any further! Please note, this recipe takes some prep time, so be prepared to get started a few days before T-Day. It’s worth it, though. Your guests will most definitely be thankful.

See below for the original post!

My Special Guest, Chef Ryan, trained at and graduated from Johnson & Wales Culinary School and has been a professional chef for over 12 years. Chef Ryan has worked at a number of 5 star hotels and restaurants, including the Mansion on Turtle Creek in Dallas and the Peninsula Hotel in Beverly Hills. After years of working in fine dining establishments, Chef Ryan is now applying his culinary expertise and experience to restaurant development and operations in the Central Coast and Los Angeles area.

The Best Thanksgiving Turkey…EVER!

First of all, I wish people would cook turkey more often than just on Thanksgiving. If you choose to prepare your turkey using my method you will see that you don’t need to cook your bird for 8 hours, taking up the entire oven, and  basting it every 20 minutes. It also doesn’t need to take up all the room in your fridge for 3 days. I gave up cooking whole turkeys many years ago because I hate dried out white meat that needs cranberries and gravy just so you can swallow it. I also decided a few years back that, as much as I love cooking Thanksgiving, I also enjoy spending the time with my family rather than only in the kitchen. Along with everything else included in my Thanksgiving menu, my turkey is prepared a day or two before, and only needs about 2 hours to cook. The trick is cooking the legs/thighs separately from the breast. This turkey carves easily, presents beautifully, tastes amazing, and guarantees success.

One Week Before Turkey Day: Order a fresh turkey from your butcher a week before Thanksgiving (note from Aimee: I buy a Mary’s Organic Turkey from Whole Foods). It you decide top buy a frozen turkey, make sure it has not been brined or has had any added water. If you’re not experienced in butchering birds, ask your butcher to separate the leg/thigh quarter from the breast and remove the rib cage from the double breast. Make sure to leave the bones in and skin on. Also, make sure the butcher saves the neck bone and rib cage (cut in 4 pieces). He can keep the liver, heart, and other trimmings.

Two Days Before Turkey Day: Soak your bird in an extremely flavorful liquid called a brine (recipe below).  Through the power of osmosis (two liquids trying to be equal) your plain, dry, flavorless bird will absorb some of the brine, making it moist and delicious. I suggest that you place your 2 leg quarters and double breast in a large heavy duty trash bag, cover it in the cold brine, remove all the air you can, twist the bag tight, then use 2 zip ties to seal the bag. Place that bag inside another bag and repeat the process. Refrigerate. This process ensures that the turkey will come in complete contact with the brine without taking up a huge amount of space in the fridge.

Turkey Stock: Quarter 2 onions, peel and chop 3 carrots, chop 3 stalks of celery and toss in a bowl with the neck, rib cage bones and just enough oil to coat. Roast in a 400 degree oven on a foil-lined cookie sheet for 30-40 minutes, or until golden brown. Place everything in a pot and cover with 2 inches of cold water. Over a low flame, slowly bring the water to a SIMMER, and cook for 4 hours. DO NOT LET IT BOIL. Strain and place in the fridge.

Turkey Day: Remove your bird from the brine, pat dry, and rub with seasoned butter (recipe below). Place the pieces on a roasting pan with a rack, and roast in a 350 degree oven until cooked. I can’t tell you for how long, so don’t even ask. Cooking time depends on many factors: When was the last time your oven was calibrated? What temperature was the turkey when it went in? How many times will you open the oven while it’s cooking (don’t do that!, by the way)? What else is in the oven with your turkey? What type of pan is the turkey in? Etc…  The turkey is done when a kitchen thermometer says it is done. Use a thermometer like this one, which allows you to run the cord outside the oven so that you can monitor the temperature without opening the oven door. The breast is done when the center of the breast meat is 160 degrees; the leg/thigh meat is done when it reaches 170 degrees. This may or may not happen at the same time. Don’t worry. You will need to rest the bird anyways, so just pull the pieces out when they are done and tent them in foil.

While the turkey pieces are resting, pour the melted butter and drippings from the bottom of the roasting pan into a pot and place over a medium heat. Simmer until the fat stops splattering (water is cooked out of the oil) and sprinkle with flour 1 tablespoon at a time, stirring until you get a something that looks like wet sand, otherwise known as a roux. Be sure to add the flour slowly to avoid lumps. Continue to cook until the roux is golden brown, then whisk with a wire whisk and slowly pour in the cold turkey stock that you made two days earlier. Return to a slow simmer. If the gravy is too thick, pour in the drippings from the resting turkey or a few drops of water. If the gravy is too thin continue to cook for a few more minutes. Season the gravy with salt and pepper to taste, then add some fresh chopped parsley for color.

As for serving, I like to pull the dark meat off the leg and thigh bones into nice chunks, removing all those little bones. Then I remove the entire breast from each side with the skin on, so you can slice it across the grain. This way, if people want dark meat, they don’t look like Fred Flintstone munching on a whole leg or need to deal with a lot of people trying to share only a few pieces of dark meat. Besides, the breast meat will be so moist that, once the dark meat runs out, people gladly will take seconds on the breast meat.

This may seem like a little more work than just sticking a 22 lb. bird in the oven, but trust me it’s not.  The bird will cook in far less than time, and will taste so good that you might even cook a turkey more than once a year.

Good luck, and Happy Turkey Day!

- Chef Ryan

Poultry Brine Recipe

• 64 oz apple cider or juice (non-alcoholic)
• 1 cup brown sugar
• ½ cup salt
• 1 tsp. chili flakes
• ¼ cup pickling spice
• 1 cinnamon stick
• 12 black peppercorns
• 1 thumb fresh ginger, smashed
• 1 head fresh garlic, split
• zest and juice of 1 orange

Boil 4 cups of the cider, and chill the remaining cider.  Add all the ingredients to the boiling cider, simmer for 2 minutes while stirring until everything is dissolved.  Add the rest of the cold cider, then marinate the bird for approximately 48 hours.  Do not begin marinating the poultry until the brine has completely cooled.

Turkey Butter Rub

• 3 sticks butter, soft
• 10-12 fresh sage leaves, torn into small pieces
• 1 tbsp. paprika
• 1 tbsp. salt
• 1 tsp. ground black pepper
• 1 tsp. brown sugar
• a pinch of cayenne powder or chili flakes

Place the ingredients in your food processor and process until well-incorporated and smooth.  If you don’t have a food processor, chop the sage finely by hand, then incorporate all the ingredients in a bowl with a wire whisk or spoon. This can be made days or weeks ahead and stored, but bring it to room temperature before rubbing onto the bird.

…it’s my SITS Day!!!*

If you’ve never been to Ain’t Yo Mama’s Blog before, welcome! I hope you’ll come back again soon. And, if you’re a returning reader, I hope you know how much I adore you already.

My two favorite guys - the Dude and the Monkey

A little about me and my blog for those stopping by for the first time:

My name is Aimee. I live in SoCal with my husband of 5 years, the Dude, and our little Monkey who turns 3 this month. I am a registered pre-licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (MFTi) but have been a stay-at-home mom since the Monkey was born. The Dude is the one who suggested I become a blogger and he is, without a doubt, my biggest supporter. He is also a silent partner here at AYMB. You see, the Dude not only created this website but he also deals with all the techy stuff (the stuff I am either incapable of doing or unwilling to learn). Although the Dude prefers to work backstage, he sometimes comes out of hiding to write about various interesting stuff, like how to make an awesome frittata.  I find more reasons to love him everyday and I’m also glad I didn’t let a small issue like height differences get in the way of true love. Yes, that pun was intended.

Being the post-modern feminist that I’ve always been, I never thought I would be a stay-at-home mom. However, I quickly learned that being SAHM was one of the best and most rewarding decisions I’ve ever made. I also realized that being a feminist and a housewife are not incompatible.  In one of my favorite posts, I talk about identifying myself as a Feminist Housewife.

I initially started my blog to provide an outlet for topics that I believe are important, such as parenting and relationship issues as well as other topics that relate to my career in counseling, my passion for good food (I am a HUGE Barefoot Contessa devotee), various worthy causes I support, and critically important social and human rights issues such as gay rights. I like discussing topics that are relevant and important to many people and not just about myself and my family (hence the name of this blog). When I started blogging, I considered it to be such a self-indulgent activity but I quickly learned that it’s much more valuable than that.  My blog is an extension of my authentic self and it became a great way to connect with other like-minded people. It was also a great way to hear from people with different perspectives and points of view, which I’m always open to hearing. I started to really appreciate the wonderful connections I was making with other people and I loved getting back just as much as I was trying to put out there. I’m proud to be a blogger, as we all should be. We all have something to say and it’s good to have our own space to speak with our minds and our hearts.

When I really appreciated blogging the most was when I started going through some tough times.  This past year has proved to be one of the most difficult years of my life. I started out 2010 with the loss of my beloved grandmother followed by the passing of my wonderful grandfather only 8 months later. They were married 68 years and I credit them with teaching me the true value of love, loyalty and, in essence, the very meaning of  ’til death do us part.

On my wedding day with my grandparents, five years ago. Their marriage lasted 68 years!

In the past year I have also said goodbye to my brother and sister who are both serving our country, in very different capacities, in Afghanistan. I’m anxious for them to return home and enjoy an ordinary life again. Blogging about the loss of my grandparents and my anxiety with my brother and sister opened up a floodgate of support and encouragement, all of which meant the world to me.

Don’t fret, though, things aren’t always so serious around here! I enjoy bringing up the funny stuff, too, like our attempts to date other couples (wait, that sounds kinda weird) or picking up on other moms in the park (no, it’s not what you might think!).  And then there is the really weird/funny stuff, like my family’s obsession with seltzer water, what it’s like being raised Catholic and Jewish, otherwise known as a Cashew — (double the guilt!), or how I have half-siblings that are young enough to be my children. It makes for an interesting relationship dynamic, which I describe as the Mother/Sister Role.

Oh, and I also do the occasional review/giveaway for products I truly believe in and value. Keep a look out for some very exciting giveaways coming up this month!

Anyways, that’s me and my blog in a nutshell. I hope you stick around for a while and check it out — I’d love to hear from you. And, if you’re a blogger, I’ll do my best to visit your blog real soon!

P.S: I’ll be at the SITS Bloggy Boot Camp in San Diego next year – hope to meet many of you there!

*If you’re confused – SITS is an acronym for The Secret is in the Sauce, a collective of over 7,000 women bloggers that support one another via comments and feedback. I have been a member of this wonderful community practically since the day my blog was born. The support and encouragement I receive means so much to me and I consider my readers and SITStas to be the fuel for this blog. Being a featured blogger for the SITS website means that your blog is introduced to many other bloggers and vice versa. It’s a big day for a blogger and I’m obviously ecstatic that my day has finally arrived!

The lovely ladies behind the website asked me to contribute an article about preparing your preschooler or kindergartner for the first day of school. As a mom to a toddler that will start preschool in a matter of a few months, I felt more than compelled to write about this topic. These prepping tips are something that I will be doing soon as well.

If you have a child starting preschool or kindergarten soon, please check out my article for a few helpful tips! If you have any other suggestions or tips, please leave a comment below. I would love to hear from you.

You see, I found out last night that one of my blog posts (THIS ONE) is being featured today over at The Secret is in the Sauce! Woohoo!

If you’re a blogger, you probably already know all about SITS. If you’re not a blogger, SITS is a wonderfully supportive community of women bloggers. It’s my favorite blogging network and I feel so fortunate to be a part of this group of fabulous women. Make sure to head over there and check it out!

I better get back to the party and start mingling with my SITStas. If you’re leaving me a comment today, I WILL get back to you as soon as I can.

Now, I think it’s time to make a batch of margaritas.

*cheers*

I was introduced to this fabulous website earlier this year and was so impressed with their helpful tips for mamas and mamas-to-be that I wrote a blog post about it. TBWaP has quickly become one of my favorite resources for parenting and lifestyle topics.

I am clearly a big fan, so it was an honor when they asked me to contribute an article. It’s up on the website now, so check it out! And while you’re there, make sure to sign up for their daily newsletter.

Aimee asked if I would provide an occasional tutorial on some of the technical aspects of AYMB, the Thesis theme/framework on which it runs, and WordPress generally. Of course, I’m happy to oblige. How many turorials will follow, and how advanced/comprehensive/technical in nature they will be, depends in large part on how they are received. So, if you dig these kinds of posts or have any suggestions, please let us know in the comments.

This tutorial focuses on a time-saving shortcut used on virtually every post on this blog. You may have noticed that all Aimee-written posts contain a signature like the one to the right. The source for the signature is a .png image file that we created by scanning Aimee’s handwriting and then sizing/colorizing it in Photoshop. In order to place and align the image, we wrap it in a <div> with the class “signature.” While she used to have to hand code this into every post, she now needs to add only this simple phrase: {signature}. This tutorial explains how.

By way of background, here is the CSS for the signature:

.signature img {margin: -7px 0 10px 25px;}

And here is the html:

<div class="signature">
<img src="/images/aimee-sig.png" alt="signature" />
</div>

Lacking my rather bizarre ability to memorize extensive bits of code, Aimee used to have to open a prior post, copy the code, return to her draft post, and then paste in the code. That’s a lot of clicking around for a rather simple chore that she now accomplishes with the shortcode {signature}. This custom shortcode functions just like the core WordPress shortcodes (such as {gallery} used to load a photo gallery).

If you’re comfortable with FTP and accessing WordPress core files, you can create your own custom shortcode in just a few simple steps:

1. Using an FTP program, locate your functions.php file within your theme’s directory.
2. Save a backup of the functions.php file, just in case things go awry.
3. Open a separate copy of the functions.php file and add your personalized code to the end.  (The code I added is below, with explanations on how to personalize it.)
4. Upload the new copy of functions.php.
5. Voila — Test with a draft post that calls your shortcode within square brackets.

(Note: You can also accomplish the above with the WordPress native editor, but without the benefit of a creating a backup.)

Here is the custom shortcode that we use for Aimee’s signature:

function aimeeSig() {
return '<div class="signature"><img src="/images/aimee-sig.png" alt="signature" /></div>';
}

add_shortcode('signature', 'aimeeSig');

To customize the code:

• replace aimeeSig in the function line with a short name that appropriately describes your function
• replace aimeeSig in the add_shortcode line with the same function name
• replace signature in the function line with the shortcode you intend on using in your posts (i.e., the word that will go within the square brackets)
• replace the html between the single quotes on the return line with whatever text/code you want inserted via shortcode

That’s it. Happy shortcoding!

About what, you ask? You, AYMB’s supposedly loyal readers.

See, while you noodle your way through Mental Mondays, feast your eyes on Foodie Fridays, and indulge all things in between, there is one thing you seem to have overlooked: The Yip Yips petition. What gives?

I grew up on Sesame Street, but cannot for the life of me remember the Yip Yips. It seems that Sesame Street ran Yip Yips segments only intermittently and only for a couple select years. Thanks to the intersection of YouTube and copyright infringement, however, I discovered the Yip Yips belatedly in between train-crossing segments on YouTube (search for “five engine train,” “SP4999” or “Minto Brown” to find clips whose conclusions will cause violent tantrums in most male toddlers).

These little alien dudes rock.

Toddlers eat up the Yip Yips because they make funny sounds; parents love them because they’re super clever and, at bottom, educational. Leave it to Sesame Street to bridge that generation gap better than almost any other show. But, alas, the Yip Yips went the way of Dynasty, only without any of the “Who shot JR?” fanfare.

At launch, Aimee took it upon herself to draw readers’ attention back to the daily Yip Yips deprivation that Sesame Street works on kids today. She wrote this article embedding the above fun video clip, started this petition, commissioned me to hack-up a sidebar button encouraging folks to read/watch the former and sign their name to the latter, and even reached out to this Facebook user and this Facebook group, which, together, boast almost 8,000 members.

Only 27 33 people have signed the petition so far. What gives? While AYMB ain’t TMZ, it certainly has magnitudes more readers than that single score of signatories.

So, for the love of God, people. For the children. For the future. For all things holy. Sign the petition, would you?

Please forward, retweet, beg, borrow, steal, cajole…whatever it takes. Future generations will thank you.

P.S. What do you think of the new Mental Monday and Foodie Friday header “buttons”?

I was thrilled when Aimee asked me to write a guest blog on Ain’t Yo Mama’s blog. I mean…I’m not a veteran blogger by any stretch, but find it fun, and since I finally own my own domain now, I’ve been making a point to blog more frequently…but I digress. To start it off, a little about me. I’m not a mother (yet). Im not a wife (yet). However in the last year, I started sewing baby clothes and selling them on Etsy. Baby Clothes? Seriously? Why? You don’t even have kids!  Well…I guess I’m nesting. That’s my only guess. With my nesting though I have automatic baby gifts to give for showers, and nowadays all of my friends or friends of friends are popping em out. My sales are mainly to my friends…and I’m totally OK with that.

Onesie prep

I don’t know if its giving away trade secrets if I let you in on my process, but I figure there are design blogs dedicated to sharing designs and craft ideas, so I wanted to let you in on how to customize your own blank onesie or t-shirt. I buy my onesies wholesale (there are a ton of vendors), but you can buy blank onesies in multi-packs and start from there.

I happen to have a lot of fabric lying around, so I am able to pick and choose what colors, etc I use, but if you are in the market for fabric, and want to put a little fabric of each color (onesies are small), I recommend using eBay. I buy charm packs that people sell for quilting. I find that 5″ squares are perfect, and I can buy the colors I need for my design of choice.

Pin and Stitch

My process is pretty simple. I figure out what design I want (draw it out on paper first), and then either draw freehand or trace the pattern on to fabric. Football season is in full effect, so I went with a simple shaped football. I then take my pins and pin it down to the onesie. I thread my needle and handstitch all the way around. If more colors and patterns are necessary, I pin and stitch those too, and if I have pieces too small for thread only, I use fabric glue where it makes sense. A lot of folks use a fuseable interfacing under the fabric for extra stiffness, but I personally like the way the fabric lays without it.

Adorable! Finished onesie with matching beanie!

The best part of hand-stitching, is its ok if you slip on a stitch every once in a while, and contrasting stitches are fine! It makes it look more handmade. In this case I even did the same to a cute beanie to match!

The stuff you buy in the stores is cute, but if you want to add the personal touch, and a little flare, I highly recommend making your own. No sewing machine skills required.

-peas

Lauren | www.thelittlegoat.com