Golden Retrievers are often used for therapeutic purposes

I recently learned that a psychology team in Afghanistan brought a few therapy service dogs with them to help the troops.  There is reason to believe that these dogs will be very helpful for the troops as they help keep spirits high and ease the mental and physical stresses associated with combat.

Since World War II, animals have been commonly used in both mental and physical therapeutic settings as a way to help the healing process. From cats and dogs to horses, animals have been proven to be a wonderful way to help people recover from both mental and physical ailments. Anyone who has a companion animal or a service dog already knows that there is nothing like holding, hugging, and petting a warm, soft, and cuddly animal to help ease the mind and soothe the soul.

Animals can help lower blood pressure and reduce stress and anxiety levels. They can also help combat depression and social isolation, two issues that are often comorbid with other mental or psychical health problems. Specially trained service animals have helped people in private therapeutic settings, schools, hospitals, convalescent homes, and even prisons.

The Army has begun using therapy service dogs to help war veterans combat PTSD and other mental health issues, so it makes sense that psych teams are finally bringing service dogs to those currently serving in war zones. It will be interesting to see how effective service dogs will be for our troops. They can certainly provide unconditional love and comfort in volatile situations, but will they also be able to help stave off mental health distress or the development of mental health disorders commonly associated with combat? Time will tell. But as the rate of mental health problems, PTSD, and suicide-related deaths increase among troops and veterans, let’s hope that therapy service dogs will prove to be a very useful therapeutic method within the military.

For my family, this meant two things.  My brother, an Army psychologist, had to leave his base in Europe and say goodbye to his pregnant wife and two year old son for the next year. It also meant that, as of the 4th of July, both my brother and sister are now living in Afghanistan.

As I spent the long holiday weekend at the beach, enjoying the company of my family and good friends, my mind was elsewhere. It was on a military plane that was flying my brother to a war zone. It was in the isolated desert compound where my sister lives and in the helicopter that transports her to various work assignments. It was with her husband, my brother-in-law, patiently waiting for his wife to return home to him. It was with my pregnant sister-in-law, living alone in Europe with her toddler, missing her husband tremendously. It was with my two year old nephew, not old enough to grasp that his daddy won’t be there every night to read him a story before going to sleep.

My brother and sister, the two people I grew up with fighting and loving along the way, do not live typical American lives. And when people you love are living an extraordinary life, it makes you appreciate your ordinary life all the more.

A few months ago, my sister called to say hello. It was 2 am her time and she had been watching her DVD’s of the TV show 30 Rock. While watching the show, she had become homesick. There is always a little ache within her – she always misses her husband and her family. But what surprised her were the little things that caused her to miss home even more, like watching a TV character drink a Starbucks coffee while casually walking down a busy city street. It was a simple reminder of her former life. She longed to do those little things that most of us take for granted, the simple things that provide normalcy. We don’t give walking down the street with a coffee in our hand a second thought. We don’t consider going to the grocery store to buy fresh food or go window shopping at the mall a big deal. Why would we? Living ordinary lives gives us the power and freedom to ignore everyday things.

When families are separated for a while, for whatever reason, it’s not just the big events that will be missed. My sister has had to miss wedding anniversaries, birthdays, and funerals. My brother will miss the birth of his second child and  his son’s third birthday. But, perhaps even more importantly, is that they will also miss the normal everyday family stuff like cooking and eating meals together, going on a walk around the neighborhood, enjoying a fun day at the park or beach, or reading a story to your child at bedtime and giving him a kiss goodnight.

I spent the 4th doing what most American families were doing, spending the day with family and friends and enjoying the fireworks. My normal and simple life will continue as usual, but a big part of my mind and heart will be in Afghanistan for a while. I will be waiting for my brother and sister. Waiting for them to return back to an ordinary life.

I also pay respect to my father.

My father survived a tour of duty in Vietnam and earned a Silver Star for his valor. He was only 23, and a newlywed, when he was drafted into the war. I was born about a year after the war ended, so I never knew the person he was before Vietnam. I cannot compare the father I know and love to the young man who left for war, but I do know one thing. He did not return home as the same person. He lost a part of himself on the battlefield, a former self that has never been recovered.

When one enters a war zone, it will be impossible to leave the same. Profound or traumatic experiences will do that to people. No one leaves war unscathed. And, for some, the psychological trauma will sustain long after physical wounds have healed. Like thousands of soldiers who have lived through war, my father deals with Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). I will not go into more specifics out of respect for his privacy, but I will say that he has been doing exceptionally well despite it.

Not everyone is so fortunate.

PTSD is a serious anxiety disorder that can develop after any traumatic or life-threatening experience. Studies indicate that about 25% of veterans of heavy combat and 75% of prisoners of war will develop PTSD. The younger the person, the more likely they will develop symptoms. About half of the patients will recover within a few months. The other half can experience years, or even a lifetime, of symptoms. It is important to know that PTSD can also be diagnosed in people who learned about a severe trauma suffered by someone they are close to – children, spouses, partners, or other close relatives.  This is crucial for families of veterans because, in many cases, members of the family may also require counseling services.

Wars will change people but, in some cases, for the better. A few studies of World War II veterans found that some soldiers left war with a new purpose and value in life as well as new tools to help cope with adversity*. The new self is a more positive self. If only all veterans could claim that to be true.

This Memorial Day is a bit different for me this year. My younger sister has been working in Afghanistan for nearly a year in a non-military position. She is doing incredible work to help bring more stability and hope to their country. My younger brother, a psychologist, is set to deploy there in a matter of weeks. He specializes in PTSD treatment and I expect that he will be doing wonderful work there as well. I am beyond proud of my baby brother and sister. And I am also scared for them. They may not see and experience the carnage and destruction that my father saw in the battlefield of Vietnam but there is no doubt that they, too, will return home changed. I can only hope that theirs is a more positive change.

This Memorial Day, please take a moment to honor our fallen soldiers. Take a moment to pay respect and give thanks to all veterans who have passed away, on or off the battlefield. And take a moment to appreciate the sacrifices that our soldiers must endure while  fighting for our freedoms and the freedoms of others. They may return home whole, but they will leave a part of themselves behind.

Need more information, assistance, or resources for psychological counseling for veterans and their families? Please contact these organizations:

Coming Home Project – a non-profit organization that works with Iraq and Afghanistan veterans, service members, and their families. This organization is based in Northern California but can provide referrals and resources around the country.

The Soldiers Project – Free, confidential, and unlimited counseling to Iraq and Afghanistan veterans and their families.

National Center for PTSD

*Human Adaption to Extreme Stress: From the Holocaust to Vietnam, Elder, G.H., Jr. and Clipp, E.C. (1988).

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It’s hard to look at these pictures without projecting our own thoughts about the war in Afghanistan and what affect it has had on their youth. What kind of life do these children lead? Are they happy? Do they share the innocence, playfulness, and carefree nature that most of our children possess? I want them to. I hope they do. But it’s hard to be optimistic and idealistic when confronted with the young faces of reality.

The images you see here are photos my sister has taken during her first year in Afghanistan. She has given me permission to use them for the purpose of this blog post. I found these pictures to be so beautiful that I was moved to share them.

(click on pics to expand)

Did these photos move you as well? Please share your thoughts.

Just today, my sister sent me a batch of pictures about a recent excursion involving a sheep slaughtering. She spared me the photos of that aspect, but she did send me photos of locals preparing what is probably the most popular dish in Afghanistan – kebabs and kofta kebabs (ground meat). Needless to say, the kebabs were prepared from the freshly slaughtered lamb.

Once the kebabs have been grilled and prepared to perfection, they are then wrapped in Naan bread. Naan bread is popular in Afghan cuisine, but also Indian, Persian, and Pakistani cuisine.  Haven’t tried Naan bread? It’s not nearly as good as fresh homemade Naan, but stores like Trader Joe’s and Whole Foods carry it. Another Afghan staple is rice and most dishes are prepared with a side of it. The many different variations of Afghan-prepared rice is considered the most important part of any meal and the wealthier you are, the more rice you eat.

When people think of Afghan crops, the controversy of poppies often come to mind. However, many of the Afghan regions are known for producing high-quality nuts and fruits, both of which are Afghan dietary staples. My sister sent me pictures of almond trees in full bloom recently which, as you can see in, are absolutely stunning.

Most American cities don’t have Afghan cuisine, but you can certainly attempt to cook it yourself! I have had the good fortune of eating authentic Afghan food and I can vouch that it is truly delectable. However, I have yet to cook it on my own. I plan to change that soon enough. The next time my sister visits me in California, I plan on preparing a large Afghan feast in her honor. But, knowing her, she’ll probably prefer a burger from In & Out instead.

If you’re interested in cooking Afghan food, check out this website, Afghan Cooking Unveiled. The recipes look fairly easy and the food looks absolutely delicious. I can’t wait to try out their recipes.

The Wine Burqa

Just what I always needed for my wine bottles. A Wine Burqa!

No, I didn’t pick up this ironic and quirky item at Cost Plus World Market. My sister works in Afghanistan and she sent me this gift.

I’ve never seen something quite so funny and sad at the same time.

Although I didn’t actually need a Wine Burqa, I’m glad my sister sent this to me.  By doing so, she brought a wonderful organization to my attention. The label says “Hand Made/Embroidered by Afghan Women” and the proceeds go to the Women of Hope Project.  The items created and sold by Afghan women help them support their families and educate their children.

Please check out their website and blog.